Hard to breath this morning
I feel overwhelmed, overloaded
Isolated from meaning
Knowing that humanity is engaged
In its last crisis of growing.
But I don’t see any new sprouts.
I see only those poisons that kill
I hear the cries of betrayal,
Of those lost in rage
And buried in uncertainty.
It is difficult for truth to be heard
When spoken in fear’s voice.
It is understandable
But I don’t know what to do.
Nothing will penetrate the mindless comprehension of frogs.
So many are seeking to recover the lost dream
Of the life that never existed.
And then in disappointment,
Shock!
Like awakening to romantic delusions without an erection.
I ask myself, “Am I awake?”
Or, “Am I buried in a nightmare?”
Or, “Am I captured in a believer’s dream?”
Where to go except into the darkness
Leaving behind even hope’s memory
Even fantasy.
Isn’t our dream of self something that cannot manifest
Without evolution’s skill?
It is the end of our kind.
It is also the end of my time.
And like everything else on the Ship of Fools
And sailing into time’s empty ending
While all seek rescue in it’s sinking
Without giving up their gold.
Only the fish know how to swim, yet for a while
In the polluted sea of extinction.
It’s goodbye to everything left behind in humanity’s wake.
So what am I supposed to do?
Masturbate my desires? Dream? Think?
There seems only one thing left for me
Aboard the Ship of Human Destiny.
I can only keep the log
And write down the story’s drowning
In sinking’s ending.
The conclusion left unwritten with nobody to read.
“And so it was for Mankind’s Journey to The Earth….”
A novel ending in the experience of fire, water and breath
The end of passion’s self indulgence in death
In a fool’s fantasy of divinity’s special notice
And never waking up to nature’s neglect and health
With an incapacity to measure rational reality
With reason traded for desire, self importance, and wealth
In the brief moment of our living within the cosmic breath.
And so, we will be buried along with the bones of meaning
Lost in the soiled remains of their passing.